Life Changes

Dear WholeMom, My father-in-law died recently. The family is planning a graveside memorial service for him and my eight-year-old son wants to be there. He's a mature kid for his age, but I'm not sure that he'll be able to handle this. On the other hand, he was not at the funeral and he says he really wants to go. He's never been in a cemetery. What do you think?

We have three boys, ages 10, eight, and six, who were attending school in a small town private school. Our oldest child has always been extremely bright. He enjoyed being popular and head of his class (and the class ahead of him.) This past summer, my husband asked the school to move him up a grade to keep him challenged. The school denied his request. So we moved all three boys to a Catholic school in a larger town 25 miles away. It has only been two weeks and no one is happy. My oldest is crying morning and night. He has headaches, stomach aches, vomiting, and diarrhea. He is not making friends well and has two to three hours of homework each night. He begs us not to send him back to the new school.

Brandon, 6 1/2, comes home one evening to discover his Daddy is leaving home. He can't understand why his parents can't solve their problems without his Daddy moving out, and he's wondering if he is to blame. I don't understand. Why did Daddy move out last night? I came home from school and he was taking out a suitcase. It looked like he was crying! Anyhow, he kind of messed my hair and said he'd see me on the weekend. Lyn kept pulling on Daddy's pants and wouldn't let him leave, but Mommy finally stopped her from running down the steps after him.