Money Issues

Dear WholeFamily Counselor, I've been in my current marriage for 12 years. I had two children prior to this marriage, and they left home years ago. We have two small children in the current marriage ( 8 and 11). My husband recently told me that he wanted me to agree to a Will, whereby he would divide our assets in thirds (upon his death): 1/3 to our son, 1/3 to our daughter, and 1/3 to me. He has this awful accusation that he states frequently -- I love my older children more than my younger ones, and he is afraid I will give them his money that rightfully belongs to his children.

I am so tired of having no money. Robert keeps taking out loans to cover debts, instead of working more. I want him to take a course in computer graphics. He could make money. But he won't do it. And he won't look for more work. He'll answer ads, but he won't go out and search. He won't do advertising. He won't start his own business. And I know why. Because he fears rejection.

I have a hard time talking to my wife about money. She says it makes her nervous - that she can't handle it. I believe her. We relate to money so differently. Growing up, money was always there for me, my family had plenty. Hers was always in debt. Owing money scares her but it doesn't bother me at all. I'm confident I'll pay it off eventually

Frank and Linda are in their forties with three children. He's a sales manager of an auto parts company; she markets cosmetics. They fight about money. He wants to save for the future; she wants the good life now. Like many couples, they're stuck in their respective corners.