Marital Questions and Answers
Am I Asking Too Much?
Dear WholeFamily Counselor, My husband and I have been married for 17 years. I have a 20-year-old son from a previous marriage. He has attention deficit and oppositional disorder. He tried the Navy and was sent home. He got into drugs. My husband and I did not handle it very well. We fought and the child just got worse. My husband kicked him out of the house and bought a ticket for him to go live with my mother.
His Mother's Ruining Our Lives
Dear WholeFamily, My husband and I just got married a week ago. We've been together for almost 4 years. We live with his ex-wife, who is also my cousin, and their 3 children. His mother despises me and I don't know why. She called his ex on our wedding night, and told her that she's the ex-wife and I'm the new wife, and that she should hate me. She's always butting in where she doesn't belong. That's why we eloped -- she wanted to take over my wedding. She's always trying to talk my husband into leaving me. And she's always trying to pry in our lives by asking the ex-wife what's going on. How can I get her to back off??? Help!
New House Blues
Dear WholeFamily Counselor, My wife and I have been married for 16 years and for the most part have been very happy until we moved into our new house in December. My wife is so upset that the house is not "perfect". We still have problems with the builder not fixing some things and this adds to her frustration. We have steadily grown apart. Last night we had a good discussion on what we thought our problems were and we both agreed that finances and the house were major problems.
Q & A: My Husband Doesn't Do His Share
My husband and I married during his medical residency. With the understanding that he had greater time constraints than I, I took over most of the household duties, including finances, and when our son was born all the child care.
Q & A: Wants Husband to Help Around The House
How do I get my husband to understand that I don't have any free time to myself? I have a three-year-old daughter who demands all my time. I work full-time and my daughter goes to preschool.
Too Much Work -- Not Enough Intimacy
Dear WholeFamily Counselor, Hi, me and my husband have been married for three years now and we have an 18-month-old son. When I first met my husband he was fun, outgoing and liked to do things. Now he thinks he is too old and doesn't want to do anything anymore. We are only 26 years old. On top of that, the sex has stopped. Granted we have a hard work schedule so we never see each other, but it is starting to bother me. Also, my outlook on life and interests are in living in a new home in the city, where he'd rather live in the country in a log cabin home.
Torn Between Work Needs and Home Needs
Dear WholeFamily Counselor, We are in our early 30s and will have been married ten years this coming June. In July '97 we had our first child. My wife took off two years (leave of absence) from work and subsequently resigned to raise our child. She was earning good wages, over $40K annually, but we were both happy with the decision. My job is somewhat stressful and makes demands on my time (whose doesn't?). I travel, on average, two to three days a week and initially that was not a problem or it wasn't apparent to me that it was.
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